where does the pee come out of this thing
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
