Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
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