never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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