she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
