Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
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