it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
