Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Randomize