We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
