we'll go far in life on tits alone.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
In other news, I just burned my penis
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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