Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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