so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
