I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
