I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
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