You're completely useless in the revolution.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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