trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
