I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
