Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
