Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
