I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
