When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize