you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
His hands were made for my vagina.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
