dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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