How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
It's never too late to be topless.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
