Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
