Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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