See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
