Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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