The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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