I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
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