I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
