Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
