i think my tv is drunk
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Randomize