once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
God I need to hump something, right now.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
