today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
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