It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
You are the jesus of drinking
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
