Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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