I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize