I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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