Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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