do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
