my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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