eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
