it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
they're like a gay fantastic four
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
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