Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
