She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
