When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I'm bleeding and have questions
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
