I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
