I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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