I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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