I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
