so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
